Egor, I can relate to both questions and the essence of your post. The first is on account of my visible ethnicity, and the second is the inevitable social and cultural judgment, as you imply. I find the context and the wrestling with the person asking always interesting. Is it a lack of awareness, lazy questioning, or something more sinister behind it? I appreciate how you frame it as maybe a bridge to connection, but it can still be provoking, and the ire is real.
I know I will sit with the question of where is home, and like our identity is its definition, a joint venture?
Jesse, thank you for adding your experience. Most people find the question innocuous and my irritation at it perplexing. But those people typically live in a homogenous circle where everyone shares most characteristics in common except small differences in ancestry. They don’t perceive the question as isolating towards someone with a notable difference. What is home? Who belongs there? Questions with many answers…
Egor, I enjoyed this article very much and have to say I'm sorry cuz I asked you those questions! But we love you both and always look forward to seeing you and hearing about your new adventures. This article provoked a lot of thought about meeting new people for me. Love ya, Lynn
Both of you, Lynn and Paul, have been very gracious and polite. You have never challenged me with ‘where are you really from’ :-). Thank you for reading! So happy to have you!
I love this, Egor! I’m asked the first question mostly, and I chose to answer that I’m from New Zealand. The rest you’ve already written about…
Egor, I can relate to both questions and the essence of your post. The first is on account of my visible ethnicity, and the second is the inevitable social and cultural judgment, as you imply. I find the context and the wrestling with the person asking always interesting. Is it a lack of awareness, lazy questioning, or something more sinister behind it? I appreciate how you frame it as maybe a bridge to connection, but it can still be provoking, and the ire is real.
I know I will sit with the question of where is home, and like our identity is its definition, a joint venture?
Jesse, thank you for adding your experience. Most people find the question innocuous and my irritation at it perplexing. But those people typically live in a homogenous circle where everyone shares most characteristics in common except small differences in ancestry. They don’t perceive the question as isolating towards someone with a notable difference. What is home? Who belongs there? Questions with many answers…
Egor, I enjoyed this article very much and have to say I'm sorry cuz I asked you those questions! But we love you both and always look forward to seeing you and hearing about your new adventures. This article provoked a lot of thought about meeting new people for me. Love ya, Lynn
Both of you, Lynn and Paul, have been very gracious and polite. You have never challenged me with ‘where are you really from’ :-). Thank you for reading! So happy to have you!